HOLDING ONTO INTIMACY

HOLDING ONTO INTIMACY

Intimacy is a loaded word with many different levels and meanings.  It is everywhere and is a journey of discovery into the relationship of life. It can be a close association or deep understanding to a subject, place or even a time in history.  It can be the quality of being comfortable, warm and familiar.  It can be the closeness one has to an instrument.  There are many things that can help us keep the intimacy alive such as honoring and loving pets, people,  and valuing the experiences in life that we live.  Showing affection, compassion and empathy are ways to  connect and stir up the intimacy within.  Connecting to nature is also part of intimacy. To be intimate is to be close to another person whereby you share openly your feelings and emotions. It is essentially letting your guard down and trusting your boundaries.  Intimacy is not only romantic love or sexual with a partner but also is present amongst close family members and personal friends. It is a process which takes time to develop, understand and open up to. It takes community and village to harness and keep it alive.  Intimacy begins with a thought and then makes its way to the heart. The heart is where emotions begin. Intimacy can be cognitive and intellectual where two people share personal thoughts and ideas.  It is also an experiential activity that two people can  share  in the  rhythm of a dance without touch or words or such as riding horses and following the same beat, the same rhythm in a harmonious moment of togetherness.  Then of course the...
Cultivating Sexual Energy

Cultivating Sexual Energy

Some questions I get are “how is sexual energy different than the rest of the energy of the body”. It isn’t different, it’s just how you channel and direct your energy as a whole. We need to first understand energy to understand how it moves and flows through the different areas of the body. Energy is in a continual flow throughout our body. The electrons have their own vibratory movements and rhythms. Our physical body learns to find its own rhythm and adjust to it. Cells and organs also vibrate rhythmically as does the heart, brain and other organs. Energy is sacred, it is who you are, and it is the orgasm of life. Energy that we use for sexuality like our potential physical energy that we use in our daily chores needs conservation and integration. It needs rest, containment, nourishment and so on. In today’s world with so much multitasking and technology “orgasmic breath” practice is crucial. We deplete our breath energy throughout the day and this is what causes the body to be in stress. It is the free flowing breath that cultivates freshness and orgasmic production. When the body is in stress the natural flow of life is disconnected and this is where a split of our being begins; thus a split in the orgasmic flow. Sex is simply a matter of energy and flow. When we understand this concept that sex is energy we then can understand how proper breath flow gives us the sexual energy we need. We then can understand that our full body energy and the sexual energy is one in nature....
Love: Do Some People’s childhoods Set Them Up To Reject Love?

Love: Do Some People’s childhoods Set Them Up To Reject Love?

By: Oliver JR Cooper While there are some people who are able to receive, there are others who are unable to do so. What this means is that although someone needs something, it is not possible for them to have it. There are then going to be others who experience life differently, and it will be possible for them to receive. This doesn’t mean that some people have everything they want and others don’t; as it is not this black and white. It is more a case of one person being open and connected to life, and the other person being closed and disconnected from life. Therefore, each person’s experience on this planet is going to be radically different. Open When one is open to life, they will have moments where they are able to have their needs met. And because they are able to have their needs met, it will make it easier for them to handle the moments where their needs are not met. One is not going to feel as though they are on the sidelines watching other people enjoy life, and they are unlikely to have a victim mentality. It is also going to be easier for them to give to others, and this is due to the fact that they are not running on empty. Balance It will be normal for them to experience balance, and this may be how they have always experienced life. However, if one was unable to receive, they are going to be running on empty. They may also have times in their life where they have what they need...
Building Healthy Relationships: Focus on Kindness

Building Healthy Relationships: Focus on Kindness

By: Dave Love is an attitude that says, “I choose to focus on helping others.” One of the wonderful things about living a love-filled life is that we are not dependent on the circumstances of our life for happiness; we can find joy in our decision and actions to love others, whether they love us in return or not. If we think of love as a feeling we will be disappointed because love is an action; love is using tools of knowledge to improve the quality of love we give. The key to finding the joy of love is to focus on giving love to others, not on receiving it. When you are choosing to enrich the lives of others through loving relationships, you will find the most satisfying form of fulfillment. In order to love effectively in relationships, we need to cultivate successful habits. Kindness is one of the seven habits of authentic love discussed in, Love as a Way of Life by Gary Chapman: Kindness is much simpler and more powerful than we realize. Kindness means noticing someone else and recognizing his needs; it means seeing the value in every person we meet. We cannot love authentically if we are not willing to sacrifice, which means meeting someone else’s needs before our own for the sake of a relationship. We often become so preoccupied with our own agenda we don’t even take the time to make the choice to be kind. The Greek philosopher Socrates warned, “Beware of the barrenness of a busy life.” Once we can stop to see the needs in people, we can take...
The 5 Characteristics Of Couples That Last

The 5 Characteristics Of Couples That Last

By: Amita Patel As a coach and soon-to-be therapist, I spend a great deal of time and energy studying relationships: what helps them to succeed, what leads to their expiration, and what impedes their growth. The more I learn about these issues, the more challenging it gets. To be honest, the project of studying relationships while being in one is kind of like Googling a symptom and diagnosing yourself with every known disease. It ain’t easy. In fact, learning about what it takes to be in a successful relationship while being in a committed partnership is, at best, laced with frustration and growth; and at its worst, it’s a recipe for disaster. Most of us know that the beginnings of most relationships tend to be filled with romance, passion, and cheese plates, and that this “honeymoon phase” inevitably ends. Yet “successful” couples last for a reason. Over time, they work together as a team to create a loving and comfortable companionship. While everyone is different, I think the recipe for lasting love is fostered by certain qualities …. Based on my studies, here are the five characteristics of couples that last: 1. Dedication A skilled clinician can tell within 10 minutes of meeting a couple whether their relationship stands a chance. How? By asking a simple question, “How committed are you to making this work?” Each partner’s commitment to the relationship not only informs whether they will last, but the overall level of satisfaction for both partners. Let’s face it: relationships take work! Both partners need to be ready to work together, not against each other. That said, it’s...
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